


Give Me A Chance

by KaniTheCrab



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: M/M, Mentioned Allura (Voltron), Mentioned Matt Holt, Mentioned Pidge | Katie Holt, Minor Allura/Lance (Voltron), established allura/lance, i post too slow on here yall im so sorry, mentioned nyma, mentioned olia, mentioned praxis, mentioned rolo - Freeform, still getting used to this keyboard oof
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-17
Updated: 2019-06-17
Packaged: 2020-05-13 09:17:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,245
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19248250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KaniTheCrab/pseuds/KaniTheCrab
Summary: James is a trapeze artist along with his friends; Ina, Nadia, and Ryan. Lance McClain gives them a chance to change their world. Lance gives Keith, a high end performer and composer, the same chance.





	Give Me A Chance

**Author's Note:**

> The song I listened to while writing this was mainly Rewrite the Stars from the movie sound track.

★・・・・・★・・・・・★

 

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

_”I think you still love me, but we can’t escape the fact that I’m not enough for you.”_

-Haruki Murakami, “ _South of the Border, West of the Sun_ ”

.・。.・゜✫・.・✭・゜・。.

 

★・・・・・★・・・・・★

 

“I hope you’re right about this.”

 

“Of course I am! Lighten up.”

 

“You’re the positive one, not me. I’m the realistic one.”

 

“And the annoying one.” Ryan piped up, jumping into their conversation. “Really, you both are realistic with a more pessimistic or optimistic view on things. Nadia here,” Ryan motioned to the fourth person in their group, shaking his head. “Now that’s positive.”

 

Ina laughed quietly to herself, rolling over to lean on her arm. “Thank you, Ryan. Now shut up James. This is good for us. All of us.” She paused, looking him over. “We can do the fancy tricks and things we like, get paid for it, and no one will look at us funny. Hell, they’ll—“

 

“They’ll cheer and be in awe of it!” Nadia finally chimed in, arms and legs going up in emphasis. “Cmon James. Even if they laugh.. Its not gonna be different. You don’t need to worry so much.”

 

James sighed, falling back onto his bed. “Right, right... I suppose you three are right. Still... Makes me anxious.”

 

“Everything makes you anxious.” Ryan sighed, turning their lamp out before laying down. “Now cmon, its time to sleep. Tell that anxiousness to pause until it can turn to adrenaline at practice tomorrow, yeah? Rest up everyone.”

 

“Mmm, goodnight mom.” Nadia teased, pulling her blanket back over herself.

 

“Goodnight everyone. Rest well— make sure you eat breakfast tomorrow please.” Ina spoke with a yawn, offering one last reassuring smile to James before laying down.

 

“Yeah... Goodnight everyone.” James mumbled, rolling to lay on his back and stare at the ceiling. Good lord this week had been a whirlwind..

 

From living at home, sort of scraping by to here. Doing what they loved instead of odd sorts of jobs. Were they like other people here? Scorned by their parents because of things they couldn’t change? No, not exactly. Just flashy clothes and too flexible and strong for their own good at times. Too daring. Too risky. But they all grew up together. No parents. A rough story on its own, but so different from the others.

 

At least they always had one another. James still found himself feeling out of place to an extent... But also like he finally belonged. A weird sensation. He supposed that it felt like this because it was so new. He just needed time to adjust. And being praised for what they love doing? That would hopefully ease things faster than they already had.

 

All thanks to that almost harebrained idea of Lance and Allura’s. The two of them were the main supporters of the whole project. Rumors of others, though, were going around. Who knew what would happen with those.

 

With a soft sigh to himself, James settled as well as he could. Time could only tell. He’ll just have to learn to be patient and let things happen as they will. Let it be how it will be.

 

Good lord that might be a hard thing to learn.

 

★・・・・・★・・・・・★

 

“Your work— Its incredible, you know. The plays you write, the acting you did for a short while. Even your compositions and your art! You’re an artist, Mr. Kogane. A talented artist and a talented businessman.”

 

“You’re flattering me, Mr. McClain—“

 

“Please, Call me Lance.”

 

“As I was saying, Mr. McClain,” Keith pointedly kept the formal title, “you’re flattering me. Just get to the point.” He glanced to the man beside him as he sipped his drink, taking him in. Not the first to try and woo him into some new business venture.

 

Lance, with a heavy sigh, relented. “I want you. Your experience and my idea? It’d be unstoppable. We could make it the greatest show in New York— The whole state! Hell, maybe even the country one day!”

 

Keith laughed at that, nearly spitting his drink. “You? You of all people are seriously going to ask me to join your circus fiasco?”

 

“Aw, c’mon now. You don’t really think that.”

 

“You’re right, I don't.” He paused, setting the empty glass down. “But I will gladly admire your work from afar. Very far.”

 

“You’ve never seen a show, have you?”

 

“No I haven’t, but I still admire what you do. Bold. Bold and ridiculously stupid. I’m comfortable with my plays and music, Mr. McClain.”

 

“Ah,” Lance leaned back in his seat. “Complacency. The enemy to growth.” He shook his head, now raising his hand. “Bartender, another round please. On me.”

 

“You realize you’re asking me to give everything up, right? My reputation, my work right now, hell— my family may disown me for this. I’d lose everything, Lance.”

 

“Well, yes, how do you think I got here huh?” He held his arms up, thanking the bartender. “Yeah, you may lose all of those things but you might just feel alive again. Enjoy that thrill again.”

 

“And who says I don’t? I can get my thrills without picking up peanut shells, thank you.”

 

“Keith— can I call you Keith?”

 

“No—“

 

“Listen Keith, this business needs you. I need you. And Ill make it worth your while. Seven percent.”

 

“Do you think I was born this morning? You’re insane.” Keith shook his head, pouring himself some from the bottle they were brought. “Eighteen.”

 

“Eighteen!? No. Absolutely not. May as well be asking for a nickel per dime.“

 

“You said you needed me.” Keith smirked, putting his hat on. “Fifteen.”

 

Lance shook his head again, closing his eyes. “I can do eight.”

 

“Twelve?”

 

“Maybe nine.”

 

Keith grinned now, leaning forward and taking his hat off. He held his hand out, making his final offer. “Ten. Take it or leave it.”

 

Lance stayed still for a few moments before opening one eye, looking him over. “Ten? Ten sounds fair.” He sat up now, shaking Keith’s hand with a grin to match his own.

 

“Well, McClain, Say hello to your new junior partner.”

 

“Mm, I’d say apprentice more like it.” Lance laughed, waving to the bartender. “One last round for after this one, then we’ll call it a night. Thanks for hosting us, Curtis.”

 

“Of course, Anytime.” Curtis gave a nod when he set the glasses down.

 

“I should head home. Thank you for the thought, though.”

 

“My pleasure, Keith. I’ll see you Monday early to show you around?” Lance asked, watching Keith gather his things and head for the door.

 

“Monday morning it is then. Good evening Lance, you as well.. Curtis, was it?”

 

“Yep, that's me. Thanks for your patronage.” Curtis responded a bit tiredly, giving a wave as the dark-haired man left. “You know what you’re getting yourself into, Lance?”

 

“Of course not,” Lance laughed. “Not fully anyways. But this risk felt like one worth taking. Besides, with his record? Its worth the risk on its own, plus my gut feeling.”

 

“Mm, Ill trust it then I guess.” Curtis chuckled.

 

★・・・・・★・・・・・★

 

“Nadia!! Go easy!” Ina called, shaking her head from the bar she was on. “We still have the rest of the day!”

 

“Aw cmon, Im fine—!”

 

“Regardless of how fine you are right now, James and I need practice on the bar. Why dont you and Ina practice on something else? You two are up swinging on these things most of the time. Can’t get to used to one thing.” Ryan sighed, leaning on the railing. “And I’m bored. And practiced on everything else I can.”

 

“He drug me along for it too! Despite my complaints.” James added, sighing. “Come on Nadia.”

 

“Fine, Fine, We’re coming!” Nadia sighed, swinging to catch Ina and go up to one of the platforms, helping the blonde up aa well. “They’re all yours, boys! Yell if you need us.”

 

“Finally.” James sighed, moving to bring one of them back in. “Ready to go?”

 

“Ready when you are, Griffin.” Ryan gave a nod, watching James swing off the platform.

 

Meanwhile, Lance was practically dragging Keith along, excitedly showing him around and introducing him to everyone. “This is Shay and Hunk— our bearded singer and our heavy-man. Oh—!! And here, this is Rolo, our tattooed man. And Nyma and Praxis, our lovely albino beauties.” Lance blew them a joking kiss, earning a couple of giggles from the girls.

 

“Good lord— how many people are there?!”

 

“Quite a few!” Lance laughed, continuing on. “We mustn’t forget the incredible dog woman, Olia! How are you today?”

 

“Huh? Me? I’m fine. You seen Matt around? We were supposed to work on a bit. Can’t find him.”

 

“Matt? He’s probably off with Pidge. That or he’s talking with Allura.” Lance shrugged, giving an apologetic smile.

 

“Ah. Well, thanks anyways Lance.” She waved with a sigh, walking off to go find him.

 

“Jesus— Matt? Pidge? Allura?”

 

“Matt does some acts but he’s mostly our engineer type guy. Insisted I let him help with the rigging for some rafters things and never left. Pidge, or Katie, is his sister. She does the same. And Allura, that’s my wonderful wife. She’s off and on being here or with our daughters.”

 

“Ah... I see.” Keith nodded, trying to take everything in.

 

“Come along— this way! You’ve seen the upstairs rooms, now to the rafters! There’s a walkway, don’t worry.”

 

“Of course, right. Don’t worry.”

 

Lance laughed even more at that, introducing everyone else they passed. “Now, finally here we are. The main room.” Lance spread his arms, gesturing around. “This is where everyone practices what cant be practiced in their rooms or in the space in our sort of backstage,” Lance went on, explaining where certain things were located.

 

Keith, at this point, had stopped listening. Almost the moment they’d walked in he’d tuned out from Lance. His whole focus was on the brunette swinging on the bars, a grin plastered on his face. “Ryan!” He called, swinging to grab his arms and flip to a different bar, grabbing on with his legs. Incredible. The fact that they could do things like that— the strength and coordination it took— and him.

 

Subconsciously Keith had stepped to the railing as he watched, stumbling back when the brunette was suddenly right in front of him. Everything seemed to slow down as he took the man in, even his breath catching in his throat.

 

James found himself having a similar experience— everything almost pausing for a brief moment while he swung up. At first he was worried he’d hit the catwalk.. but then it was because of the man standing there. He’d never seen him before. Maybe a new hire? Hopefully someone worth getting to know.

 

“That—“ Keith interrupted Lance, who was rambling about the buildings floor-plan still. “Who was that.”

 

“Him? James, and the other man is Ryan. The girls down there— blonde and brunette— are Ina and Nadia. Our trapeze artists.”

 

“James...” Keith nodded quietly. “James. Got it. Thank you.”

 

“Ah... you’re welcome. You can talk with them more after they’re finished practicing. Though its hard to tell when that may be.” He shrugged slightly as he spoke.

 

Keith gave a small nod, moving to stand and watch them again. “Absolutely incredible...”

 

“They certainly are. I’ll leave you to watch for a while— explore some on your own. Good-luck.” Lance gave him a pat on the shoulder before leaving him be, going off to see what was needed of him for the day.

 

He stayed there for what felt like ages, simply watching the two go over their routine. He even found himself watching when the girls had joined them, finding himself smiling at what they did. Hearing them joke around with one another and enjoy themselves... It was contagious. Almost.

 

“Ina! Headed your way!” James yelled after a while of the four of them being up there. With the routine long done, it had been time for some more free styled types of tricks. Harmless fun, really.

 

“Oh no you aren’t, Griffin! I’ve already got Nadia, I can’t hold you both!”

 

“Then pass her off! She always hogs you.” James laughed, hanging on the bar as it swung.

 

“Hey! I do not!” Nadia whined, letting Ryan grab her legs so she could swing and grab onto a different one. “If anyone does, its you!”

 

“Oh I absolutely do not!”

 

“You both hog her if you ask me.” Ryan piped up, swinging up to one of their platforms.

 

“Cause shes the easiest to work with! James is too cautious and you’re too stiff.”

 

“Ill remember that, Rizavi. Next time ill be spontaneous and let you fall.”

 

“Oh yes please, I’d love that.” Nadia snorted, sticking her tongue out at James.

 

“You’re both babies. Heavy babies. James, pass off to Nadia—“

 

“No thanks, ill take the open bar.”

 

“Fine, just hurry up before I drop you, you oaf.”

 

James sighed, doing as she said before yelling to Ryan. “What’s the time?”

 

“About eleven.”

 

“Probably a good time to break so we can rest and not throw up when we eat, right?”

 

“Yeah, Ina’s right. Lets stop for a while. We can run through everything again later, if we have time before tonight.”

 

Ina only gave a nod and made her way to the nearest platform, Nadia doing the same with an “aye aye capitan.” James followed suit, though he stumbled slightly when he landed at the edge of the platform.

 

Luckily for James, Keith’s first reaction was to step forward and grab onto him, pulling James forward and nearly into himself. “Ah— careful there... You alright?”

 

“Me? I’m- Im fine, yes..” James stepped back a small bit, his face flushed a deep red. “Thank you...?”

 

“Oh— Keith. Keith Kogane.” He held a hand out quietly, taking his hat off.

 

“Ah... Pleasure to meet you, Mister Kogane.” James paused before shaking his hand. “You must be a new hire.”

 

“Ah— yes, I am.”

 

“I see. Im James Griffin. You obviously saw my act, what’s yours?”

 

“My act?” Keith asked, obviously confused. “I don’t have an act.”

 

James shook his head now, looking him over with a slight hum. “Mister Kogane, everyone has an act sooner or later. You’ll find yours eventually—“

 

“James! Come on!”

 

“—Looks like Nadia’s yelling for me. I’d better go.” He gave a slight bow before turning to walk away. “Glad you enjoyed the show. I’ll be seeing you.”

 

“Right... ah... goodbye then.” Keith spoke almost lamely, watching him walk away.

 

★・・・・・★・・・・・★

 

Through the next few weeks, the two had plenty of encounters. Mostly out in the dressing areas, backstage, or even out on the stage. Usually just small talk, a bit of flirting but nothing too serious. Well, not at first. It wasn’t until about a month and a half into Keith working with Lance that he decided to make a bigger step with the trapeze artist. All through the show that night he watched, his eyes practically glued to James and his partners whenever they were on stage. Their work was incredible. He’d never seen anything quite like it until he’d come to work here.

 

As the crowd slowly cleared out, pushing through the protesters outside the doors, Keith made his way back to the dressing room of the four trapeze artists, heart hammering in his chest. Was he usually the romantic type? Not at all. But making the first move himself may be the only way they get past flirting in the halls.

 

“Ina— Ina quit it!” James protests could be heard from the hall, laughs cutting into them.

 

“Now now, don’t resist hun. Cause we have more hats and you’re gonna get one whether you like it or not. And look, we even got a cake for you! Humor us, please?” Ina laughed, fixing a quite ridiculous hat onto James head. “Nadia, light the candles please?”

 

“Sure thing!” She grinned, doing as Ina had asked once the cake was set on their vanity. “Happy birthday!”

 

“Mhm, Happy birthday James.” Ryan spoke with a sigh, reluctantly letting Ina put a hat on him.

 

“Happy birthday Jamie! Now, blow out the candles!” Ina said.

 

“Jamie-?” Nadia questioned, cut off by James.

 

“Nadia, Call me that again and it’ll be the last time you do.” He gave her a joking glare, thinking for a moment before blowing out the candles. “Wish is made and no, before you even ask, I’m not telling you guys what it was.”

 

Nadia groaned, sliding down in her seat as Ina moved to cut into the cake. She’d cut the four of them a slice from the small baked good before Keith knocked on the doorframe and cleared his throat. “I hope I’m not interrupting...?”

 

“Keith-!” James perked up, a deep blush on his face. Leave it to Ina to put him in a big feathery hat right now. “No— no you aren’t interrupting... would you like to come in?”

 

“Oh— Ah... I suppose I could for a few moments. I was hoping just to speak with you, though, if you wouldn’t mind it?”

 

“Ah.. of course, alright.” James set his plate down, carefully taking the hat off as he stood. “Ill be back in a moment then, try to leave me a bit of cake huh?” He teased lightly as he walked to the door, shutting it behind him.

 

“James.. I’m sorry to take you away from your friends like that. I can speak with you another time if you’d rather—“

 

“No.. Its alright Keith, really.” He offered a slightly smile, shifting his weight around on his feet. “What is it you wanted to talk to me about?”

 

“I.. Wanted to give you these.” Keith carefully held out a card, along with a cut rose. Cheesy? Absolutely. But Keith is simply a man who knows barebones romance. “And.. ask you to come to my apartment for a bit of celebration. You put on an incredible show tonight and it is your birthday... And with a new bottle of wine at home, I thought it might be nice to treat you to it— if you’d like, that is.”

 

James was silent for a moment before a smile came to his face, nodding quietly. “I’d love to... Though I can’t come right away. Got to help those three clean up their party supplies... But I’ll come by soon. Thank you..”

 

One of few genuine smiles came to Keith’s face at that, the small breath he’d held now escaping him. “Great— Ill see you shortly then. Ah... My apartment number is in the card. I wanted you to have it incase you ever needed anything.. You’re welcome to come to me for anything.”

 

A soft laugh left James as he turned to go back into the dressing room, shaking his head. “I’ll keep that in mind. Ill see you shortly, Keith.” He gave a slight wave before disappearing back into the dressing room.

 

Keith only had time to nod in response before James was gone, quickly turning to rush home. He wanted to ensure everything was perfect for the evening.

 

“Sooo, what’s that you have there?” Nadia asked James the moment he came into the room.

 

“A card and a rose from an admirer, Nadia. A shame you don’t know what thats like.” He teased, sticking his tongue out at her as he sat down.

 

“Hurtful! And rude! What happened to our nice, quiet, and polite choir boy who just dressed flamboyantly and did flips?”

 

“He joined the circus and learned how much fun it could be to poke some harmless fun at you, but will immediately stop if he takes it too far because upsetting you for real would get him either punched or make him upset if not both.” James spoke as he plopped down in his chair.

 

“Mmm, How thoughtful of you.”

 

“Anyways,” Ina interrupted, rolling her eyes. “What did Keith want?”

 

“Oh! Well... He gave me these—“

 

“Obviously—“

 

“Shhh. Anyways, he gave me these and then invited me over to his apartment after we were finished here.”

 

“Well birthday boy, why dont you finish your cake and then head out? We can handle the cleaning part. But we owe you our own little celebration, yeah?”

 

“Of course, Ina.” James flashed them a small grin as he began to eat his slice of cake. First this wonderful cake, and then next an evening with Keith of all people. Today seemed to be turning into quite a wonderful one.

 

With a small hum, James read the note and ate his cake as the others tidied up.

 

_ James, _

_ I know this is out of the blue to ask (and redundant if I managed to ask you in person), but I hope you would be willing to join me this evening for a small celebration of your birthday and the wonderful show you’ve put on tonight. _

_ I must admit that working with you has been absolutely incredible and I would love to get to know you better. All I ask is that you give me a chance, but I won’t hold any grudges if you decide you do not wish to. I do hope that we can still continue to be friends if you decline, though. _

_ You’re a wonderful person, James. And I consider myself a very lucky man to know you. Happy birthday. _

_ Sincerely yours, _

_ Keith Kogane _

 

★・・・・・★・・・・・★

 

“I really didn’t see my night turning out like this. Wine and a massage from Keith Kogane himself.”

 

“Well, the wine was planned. The massage wasn’t but I couldn’t exactly sit around and watch you wince from how stiff you are.”

 

“Eh, Its fine. I usually sleep it off and then stretch the next day.” James shifted slightly, a slight groan leaving him. “Jesus... where did you learn to do this?”

 

“Ah... My brother.” Keith paused, giving a slight smile. “He has a muscular disease. He’d get all locked up sometimes and this seemed to help.”

 

“Mmm... Have I ever told you that you’re a wonderful man who knows how to treat a person?”

 

“Ah, I wouldn’t go that far.” Keith shook his head, moving away now so James could sit up. “Care for another glass?”

 

“I’d love one... Thank you.” James smiled as he spoke, letting Keith pour more of the wine into his glass. “So Keith... What exactly were your intentions for inviting me over tonight...?”

 

“Well, the only clear intention I had was wine and then doing my best to make whatever else happened enjoyable for you.” He took a sip from his glass, looking over to James from the corner of his eye. “Was there something specific you were hoping for?”

 

“Well...” He paused, rubbing the back of his neck. “I half expected you to just try and take me to bed and leave it at that.”

 

“Well, then you got your wish—“

 

“Oookay first off, that isn’t what I meant and you know it.” James laughed, cutting Keith off. “A massage is not what I was picturing. And second off, when did you get any sort of a sense of humor, Mister Stoic?”

 

“I’ve always had one,” Keith chuckled now, “Just kept it quiet because all of the jokes were boring puns about the situation.”

 

“If you insist.” James shook his head with another laugh. “Anyways..”

 

“Anyways... If that’s what you would have wanted, I can’t say I would have been opposed. You’re incredibly attractive, you know that?”

 

“You’re too kind—“

 

“I mean it. And you’re a wonderful person... You care for those around you,” Keith sat his glass down, moving to carefully touch James’s hand. “You’re funny, witty, amazingly talented... James, I’d be honored if.. we could try and make something out of nights like this. Make something more than just flirtatious encounters out of our current relationship.”

 

James was silent for a few moments after he spoke, looking down at their hands and setting his glass down. “Keith... It couldn’t possibly—“

 

“Why not?” Keith frowned, moving to lift James’s chin up to look at him. Bold first steps, yes. But with just the two of them.. He felt more confident. More bold. “No one would disapprove— no one that matters. Lance wouldn’t, I certainly hope your friends wouldn’t, no one else there... All I ask is you give this a chance.. Please James. I am hopelessly head over heels for you and I want to do everything i can to treat you well. You deserve the world.. And I want to be the one to give you all of mine.”

 

“Keith... Keith I don’t know what to say...”

 

“Say yes, James.... Just to giving this a shot.” Keith gave him a very soft smile, lacing their fingers together. “Just a chance...”

 

With a deep breath, James nodded. “Alright... We can give it a shot—“ He cut off with a surprised noise as Keith scooped him into a hug, laughing as he returned it.

 

“I’ll do right by you, James. Honest to God, I will.” He spoke into his shoulder, pulling away enough to look him in the eyes. “Thank you...”

 

“Its my pleasure, Keith...” He responded quietly, taking another deep breath and shutting his eyes as he leaned his cheek against Keith’s. “I hope this will work... I really do.”

 

“We’ll make it work... Together. I have faith in us.” Keith spoke quietly, letting his eyes close.

 

★・・・・・★・・・・・★

 

Nights like that one became common. Wether they drank or not, the two would often spend the evening in Keith’s apartment talking the night away, dancing to old records, or just sitting quietly together. But that was as far as things went. Keith’s apartment or inside of the circus building. Rare were walks outside, unless it was the two of them walking to the apartment and back.

 

Keith hadn’t imagined James as such a private individual at first, but it seemed that he was. And that’s what Keith believed for months. He’d asked James a few times to go to dinner or to see shows with him, but James always claimed to be too tired. Even when they’d traveled to Europe, James didn’t seem to wish to go out in public with him.

 

Well, tonight was the night to confront him about it. It was early in the morning— luckily they didn’t have a show the next day, or else staying up all night like this would be detrimental to James’s act. Quietly, Keith moved to put his arms around James’s waist as he looked at the records Keith had.

 

“I don’t know why you always sit and look through them, James... They’re always the same.”

 

James laughed, leaning back so his back was pressed into Keith’s chest. “Sometimes I like to really think about what I’d like to play. Other times I like to think about all the memories that accompany these records.”

 

“You’re as bad as an old housewife sometimes.” Keith laughed, putting his chin on James’s shoulder.

 

“Mmm, perhaps. I’d prefer to just say I’m a sentimental man, though.”

 

“I can live with calling you that.” Keith murmured as James put a record on. He couldn’t place the song off the top of his head, but it was something soft yet more upbeat. “James? May I ask you something?”

 

“Hm? Of course. What is it?”

 

“Why don’t you want to be seen with me in public?”

 

James was silent for a few moments, biting the inside of his cheek. “What are you talking about.”

 

“You know what I’m talking about. No matter what, whenever I ask you to go out you say no... That you’re too tired or some other excuse. But.. you’ll go out with your friends. Don’t lie to me, James... I just want the truth.”

 

“I don’t want people to look at you the way they look at me.” James spoke after a moment, letting out a shaking sigh. “You don’t know what its like, and I don’t want you to ever know.”

 

“James— James I don’t care how other people will look at us. Let them be judgmental. That’s on them. What’s so wrong with me wanting to spend an evening out with the man I love?”

 

“Everything is! You shouldn’t love me in their eyes— Im nothing but a circus performer who came from nothing! Havent even got parents— I raised myself on the streets!” He pushed away from Keith, shaking his head. “I’m not like you. They won’t accept us. They won’t ever.”

 

“I don’t care about that. I don’t care what they think.” Keith sighed, gently pulling James to face him. “To them, parents may be the only thing we have in common. I was raised by my parents friends— you only had you friends. But you know what? That doesn’t matter to me. Because I know we have more in common. We love our jobs, we love dancing together late at night, we both love each other and just being around one another. Why should those stuck up high profiles matter to us as long as we have each other?”

 

James shook his head, pushing away from him. “You don’t understand what its like and I don’t want you to understand what its like, Keith!!” He stopped, lowering his voice. “Please— can we just drop it—“

 

“No, No we can’t because that isnt the real reason. You’re embarrassed. Maybe not of me but of yourself.” Keith shook his head, moving to sit on his couch. “How can I help you not be?”

 

“You can’t. So just— Just drop it, okay? I don’t want to talk about it anymore.” He sighed, moving over to him. “Can we please just go back to how it was a few minutes ago...? I don’t want to argue... I just want to have a nice night with you...”

 

He sighed, shaking his head with a bit of a forced smile as he let James tug him to his feet. “I can’t say no to you... But we’ll have to go to bed soon. Its almost dawn.” Keith would just have to find some way to try and help him be comfortable on his own. He already had an idea beginning.

 

★・・・・・★・・・・・★

 

“Lance?”

 

Lance looked up from his desk, stretching some. “I was just about to come get you! Cmon, come in and sit. Close the door behind you please.”

 

“Right...” Oh good lord here we go again. “What is it?” Keith asked, doing as Lance had asked.

 

“A whole tour with that opera singer! I’ve already got the plans in the works. The first show was so successful, can you imagine how well a national tour would do?”

 

“Woah woah wait, wait.” Keith shook his head. “Can you imagine how expensive that would be? You have to rent out all of those theaters by the seat ahead of time.”

 

“I know, I know! I already got the loan to do it.”

 

“Does Allura know?”

 

“Well ah... No. No she doesn’t. But it’ll be fine.”

 

“Lance, it wont pay for itself until fourty shows in—“

 

“Fourty one, actually. But it’s going to be fine! We’ll do the tour while you run the show here—“

 

“You want me to run the show here!?” Keith stood up quickly, shaking his head. “No. No way. Have you seen how many protesters there are now? I can fill in the few nights you can’t be here, but every show for months!? I can’t do that—!!”

 

“Oh yes you can.” Lance waved a hand in dismissal. “The protesters are fine. Controversy stirs up intrigue and ticket sales! And you can do it, you’ve done fantastically the other times!”

 

“Lance—“

 

“Now, what is it you needed from me?”

 

One hell of a raise was Keith’s first thought, though he kept that to himself. “I already bought tickets to the show tomorrow at the Altea theater. The one that James has been saying he wanted to see. I doubt he’ll go if I ask him—“

 

“Why’s that?”

 

“Says he doesn’t want to bring any odd looks my way. Anyways, could you tell him that you have a seat reserved for him and to ask for it at the box office?”

 

Lance nodded, leaning back in his chair. “I suppose I could do that. Its the least I could do, anyways.”

 

“It certainly is.” Keith shook his head. “I want to discuss a raise when you get back, by the way.”

 

Lance laughed, staying where he was as Keith was leaving. “I’ll think about it Kogane. See you later on.”

 

★・・・・・★・・・・・★

 

James almost hadn’t come tonight. Almost. But this was a show he’d longed to see, and Lance had personally left a ticket for him. So perhaps one outing like this couldn’t hurt. “Ah.. Hello. Mister McClain left a ticket for me?” He spoke to the clerk, smoothing out his shirt. Bright colored and a bit flashy, Ina and Nadia had insisted on it and that he keep the bright color from the last show in his hair. They said it looked nice on him. He couldn’t agree, but decided he may as well humor them.

 

“Alright, just one moment honey.” The woman practically chirped, looking through envelopes. “Here you are. There were two tickets.” She held out the envelope, still smiling.

 

“Two? Ah... There was only supposed to be one, ma’am...”

 

“No,” A voice cut in, the man behind it jogging to carefully take the envelope from the clerk. “There were supposed to be two, thank you miss. We’ll go seat ourselves.” He tipped his hat to her before leading James away, an arm around his waist.

 

“Keith...!! What on earth are you doing here?”

 

“I didn’t think you’d come if I asked... so Lance asked for me.”

 

“Keith, you know how I feel about this—“

 

“I do. I know that you’ve been dying to see this show. So lets go see it, alright? Just trust me.”

 

James shook his head with a sigh, half huddling into Keith’s side. “Fine. Lead the way to our seats then.”

 

Everything went great. The show was wonderful and seeing James enjoy himself so much was even better. Keith kept an arm around him as they moved to leave, happily letting him talk about the show. He was so happy and excited about it. “Keith... Thank you so much for tonight.. I loved it. Im glad we got to share tonight together—“

 

“Keith? Is that you? My, my. Its been a long time, hasn’t it been my dear cousin?”

 

“Oh no.” Keith mumbled, taking a breath before turning around. “Lotor. Good evening.” James frowned a little when Keith stopped, reaching to grab his hand as Keith introduced him. “Lotor, this is James. And that must be Axca?”

 

“Keith... Can’t we go— We have a long day tomorrow—“ James spoke quietly, chewing his lip.

 

“Mhm. Axca, daughter of the owners of this theater. Not... Someone who works in one.” Lotor looked James over with a small snort before looking back to Keith. “You’re a wonder, Kogane. Very commendable that you’d treat your staff to a night out. Though I can’t believe you’d fraternize with them more than that—“

 

“Lotor, that’s enough—“

 

“To each their own though, I suppose. But I can’t say I’d be caught dead with the help. Especially when they’re so... distinct in a crowd.”

 

“Lotor, I said that was enough—“ Keith cut off as James quickly pulled away from him. “James— James wait!!!”

 

“Ah. A shame. Though he won’t be hard to find!” Lotor snickered, turning to walk off.

 

It took all of Keith’s willpower to not knock those awful words right back into Lotor’s mouth. But right now, James was what was important. And contrary to what Lotor believed, finding James in a crowd wasn’t easy. In fact, it was impossible. All he could do was go back to the circus building and wait for James. Wait and pray that he would come there.

 

Keith’s prayers were answered though, as James was already there. There and having himself tucked quietly up on one of the trapeze bars.

 

“James—!”

 

“Leave me alone, Keith.”

 

“James, please come here—“

 

“No! This isn’t going to work, Keith! You can’t fix this! As much as we want to be together, it won’t ever work!”

 

“It wont work if you let it fail, that’s for sure! Who are those people to tell us who we should be!? James, you’re the one for me. The person I was meant to find!”

 

“You’re acting like this is easy for me! I want to come down to you— But it would never work!” James shook his head, sighing quietly. “Some day you’re going to find the person meant for you. And they’re going to be the luckiest person out there. But that person isn’t me. Its impossible for it to be me.”

 

“It isn’t impossible. We can make this work!” Keith stepped closer to where the bar hung over his head. “James, please...”

 

“No.”

 

“James—“

 

“No. We’re just going to get more hurt. Its best we leave it here... Goodnight, Keith.”

 

“James... please don’t say that.”

 

“Goodnight, Keith.” He spoke more firmly now, though he didn’t look at Keith. He couldn’t. He’d break down if he did.

 

Keith didn’t respond to that, he simply turned and left as James wished. If he spoke anymore he’d break. He couldn’t force James into this. He just had to hope that one day, James would come back to him. Until then, he’d just have to be patient. But being patient when the memory of James walking with him or being with him in his apartment being so fresh was going to feel like walking through hell.

 

They didn’t speak unless they needed to for weeks after that. Just polite conversations. Nothing more. And everyone close to them could see how it was killing them.

 

★・・・・・★・・・・・★

 

“James... Maybe you should talk to him.” Ina spoke quietly, fixing his hair for him. It was just them in their dressing room, Nadia and Ryan were still back at their apartment.

 

“No.. Ina, Its best this way.” He sighed, shutting his eyes.

 

“Please just think about it? Talk to him after the show tonight?”

 

“I don’t know...”

 

“It’s obviously hurting you both. And having to perform with him while there’s still feelings between you?”

 

”Fine, fine... I’ll think about it at least. I make no promises though..”

 

”If that’s the best I’ll get, I guess I’ll take it.” Ina sighed, gently hugging him.

 

・★・

 

Looking back on it, he should have gone and talked to Keith right then. And looking now, as their theater burned down, he couldn’t feel a thing. He was in shock. James and Ina has stumbled out and to the group at the front much later than the others, holding on to one another as the fire roared. They’d barely gotten out, but they did and now they were huddled together with Nadia and Ryan around them.

 

It wasn’t until someone yelled for Keith that James’s attention was snapped back from his small group. Keith... did he not make it out? No— No he was running back in!

 

“Wh-What the hell is he doing!?” James took a few steps forward, only to be shoved backwards by— Lance?? What in gods name was going on?

 

Everything seemed to move in slow motion yet too fast as well. It felt like ages before Lance came forward with Keith. Keith, burned and covered in ash. Lance said he was alive but never did someone alive look so dead to James. Too slowly he was taken away to a hospital. And then too quickly was the building gone— too slow the fire put out. They must have stood there for hours watching everything happen, but everything was a blur to James. Everything except for keith’s face— his chest hardly moving.

 

Oh God. Keith.

 

Keith.

 

He was running before he even realized it. His friends let him go, however reluctant they were to do so. The nearest hospital was the one they took him to, thank God. James would have passed out had it not been that one.

 

“Keith Kogane— where— where is his bed?” He managed to choke out, asking the nurse at the desk.

 

“Sir... Sir Mister Kogane is stable— you must calm down.” The woman spoke as she came around the desk to try and support him. “I’ll take you to him in a moment.. the doctor needs to see him again, and you need to be cleaned up and looked over. I promise, you can see him shortly.”

 

James very reluctantly let the woman lead him to a small wash room, letting her clean some of the ash from his skin and get him some water to drink. She even gave him an old blanket, hoping that would calm him.

 

“Easy dear... Working yourself up won’t help. You can see him soon—“

 

“You’re sure he’s okay?”

 

“I’m sure. Absolutely sure that he’s stable now.”

 

“When can I see him—? Please— I need to see him... I have to see him.”

 

“Just give the doctor a few more minutes with him—“ She stopped, hearing a knock on the door. “Ah.. I bet that’s them now. Come on dear...” She gently pulled him to his feet, fixing the blanket around him. “Right this way.”

 

Seeing Keith finally... It was a relief. A relief and a stabbing pain in his chest. Very shakily he sat himself down in a chair they’d given him, taking Keith’s hand. “Hey.. I’m... Im here now... I should have been there for ages but... I let everyone get in the way...” James sighed, looking over his face. A sooty grey color even with the ash washed away. And a nasty burns on his face.

 

“I.. I am so sorry, Keith.... Please... Please wake up so I can fix things... I love you, Keith... I need you....”

 

James said those words often, or at least a variation on them. Each day he would tell Keith about how the doctors said his recovery was going. About what they’d found in the remains of the building. How Lance was fixing things the best he could— both with his wife and with the bank. How everyone had motivated him again to keep going.

 

Occasionally, the others would come and visit. Lance was the only one who came multiple times, aside from Ina, Nadia, and Ryan. But they came mostly to check on him. Lance came to visit Keith.

 

James left Keith’s side only for those moments. Those moments and the times the hospital staff shooed him away. For two weeks, but what felt like an eternity, Keith stayed with him. It was mid afternoon when his vigilance paid off.

 

A small squeeze to James’s hand and the faint sound of his name was all the warning he was given before Keith pulled him forward to hold him. James didn’t resist at all, he simply held onto Keith and let the apologies tumble forward. The apologies and the promises never to cut things off again like that if only Keith would have him again.

 

“James..” He finally spoke louder, trying to sit up and look at him. “James you idiot, of course I’ll have you again...”

 

“You will...?”

 

“As long as you promise to talk to me... work with me on things...”

 

“I swear it on my life... I-I’ll try as hard as I can to work with you... I don’t want to lose you again... Not ever...” James pulled away a small bit to look at him.

 

“The feeling is mutual..” Keith spoke quietly, squeezing his hand tighter now.

 

“I love you, Keith...”

 

“And I love you too, James.”

 

★・・・・・★・・・・・★

**Author's Note:**

> Some parts felt a little rushed to me but man did I have fun writing this! I hope you guys enjoy this rendition of The Greatest Showman AU!  
> Request done for Aqua Illustrations on Amino.  
> There were so many heart attacks posting this bad boy but here we are.
> 
> Follow me on Amino and Tumblr for updates on works, myself, and extra notice for when things are posted.
> 
> Art by Aqua on Amino!  
> https://aminoapps.com/c/voltron-legendary-defenders/page/blog/anything-is-possible-with-you-jaith-gift-for-danidisasterqueen/PmNe_zgumu6eYkZBgkgZJG2pzdD2rQEq7Z


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